Girl Scouts Vest

I was never a Girl Scout. I know you do stuff and get patches to show that you did that something (and that you then sew those patches on a vest). That's where my knowledge ends.

I was thrift shopping and caught sight of this Girl Scouts vest and had to take photos because of these patches. Some of these patches made me so sad. They're just not cute. [Pause.] Or they're just plain confusing.

I realize that some of the topics for these patches must be hard to design for. It can be difficult to distill a thought into an image. I know this because I look at the patches on the front side of the vest, and I don't know what a good chunk of them mean.

My best guesses to what these patches mean:

• "Please" with hearts = learning how to say "please" to appease
• Green cloud with color rays = superpower rings coming together to create a poof of energy (in my head there's some connection to the cartoon Captain Planet)
• Sun, cloud and rain = I live in the Pacific Northwest and this is what the weather is like
• Earth surrounded by black oil spill = cloud of evil surrounds Earth (like in A Wrinkle in Time)
• Three bears in a circle = dancing bears are awesome!
• Gold circle-like shape = pirate gold!

The patches on the back seem more self-explanatory. Sewing, food drive, scrapbooking—there's no mystery there. Although, I'm curious what "Thinking Day" is…is it something about how to save the planet, maybe? And the Princess Zip patch? No clue. However, I find the Build-A-Bear Workshop patch to be the most perplexing, as it is a brand and not a concept. It feels very out of place to me. As if suddenly I saw a product placement in a movie. This vest brought to you by Build-A-Bear Workshop. Find a location near you.

To me, if you can't immediately understand what something is by looking at it, then at least make it pretty. I just wish the patches looked better by themselves as well as with one another.